I have to begin this by thanking Pilar for inspiring me to write something about my experiences at A&M. I've been wanting to do this for a while and after reading her blog, I think now is the time.
To say that I was born an Aggie would be the understatement of the century. To say that I "bleed maroon" or that I've been raised a die hard Aggie would be like saying that Mother Teresa was a good lady. These would all be major understatements.
My dad has had season tickets since the early eighties...same section, same row, same seats, with the same person: one of his college roommates, Gilbert. We would always rotate who got to go with Dad that week (my mom or brothers usually won) or sometimes we would luck out and get extra seats and would all get to go. At this point, I loved A&M because my parents loved A&M, because my brothers loved A&M, and I loved all of them, so I loved A&M. I stood tall when we were on a losing streak which, let's face it, has happened more than we would have liked in recent years. I never faltered, never jumped on the other team's bandwagon no matter how many of my friends did. We would go to basketball games and baseball games and no matter how bored I got, I always appreciated the atmosphere and warm environment. We bundled for the cold football games. We layered for the Independence Bowl in Shreveport when the Ags played Mississippi State and lost in double overtime after a few inches of snow and a very cold and almost frostbitten 9-year-old Rebecca. I had already experienced a great deal of Aggieland at this point. And then Mark entered his fish year at A&M.
Mark is my oldest brother, almost eight years my senior. I was in fifth grade when he came to A&M and joined the Corps of Cadets, Company L-1. My cousin, Kevin, was a senior in L-1 which made Mark's decision to join. This was an entirely new experience for all of us and I became obsessed. All I talked about was Mark and the Corps. He was my hero, so brave for enduring such hardship and never complaining. He was so old and grown up for already being in college and was just so....cool. We went to all of his Corps events: reviews, barbecues, football game march ins, and receptions. He joined Parson's Mounted Cavalry his sophomore year and helped turn the program around with the help of his classmates. His senior year he was Executive Officer of the Cavalry and of L-1 and by this time he had made incredible, lifetime friends and had matured into a confident, successful man. I couldn't have been more proud of him.
Patrick is my second oldest brother by five years. He was not as sure about joining the Corps as Mark had been, but decided to in the end. His fish year was Mark's senior year, so they had one year together. Pat blossomed throughout his time at A&M and in the Corps. This was his place, where he was meant to be. He was chosen to be guide on bearer for his outfit, which meant that he was in charge of carrying and protecting their flag, a much more daunting task than it sounds as these outfits like to steal each other's flags. The biggest thing to happen to him occured in the spring of his sophomore year. Patrick was elected to be a junior yell leader. This experience was huge for him and for our entire family. It was like he was royalty...instantly famous among Aggies. We were opened to a whole new world full of experiences including marching down the streets of campus in the torchlight parade before midnight yell practice and then entering a stadium of thousands of screaming people through a tunnel on the arm of one of the people that they were ALL waiting for. It was incredible. As a sophomore in high school, this was probably about THE coolest thing that ever could have happened to me. Patrick was also chosen to be a Ross Volunteer, head yell leader, a class agent, and was voted the outstanding senior in the Corps of Cadets his senior year. On top of all of this, Patrick had been very involved with St. Mary's Catholic Church and had always talked about Aggie Awakening. He was always striving to be a good example to his underclassmen and to the rest of the student body as he was an ambassador for A&M. I was a junior in high school when Patrick was a senior at A&M and had grown to be friends with his buddies as we were a little closer in age than Mark and I. It was a lot more emotional for me to watch all of them graduate because I had watched them evolve from shy, timid, bald, scrawny freshmen into secure, confident, mature seniors and I knew things would never be the same with everyone gathered at the outfit barbecue or all the guys hanging out in Pat's room or summer house because they would all scatter to different cities. I also knew I was next in line.
Whether or not I would go to A&M was never a question. I wanted to go to A&M because I wanted to go there, not because my parents wanted me to go there (they did, of course) but because it was my decision. I couldn't imagine going anywhere else and I didn't apply anywhere else. I would go to A&M right off the bat and if I couldn't get in, I would go to Blinn and transfer. That was that. Fortunately, I got in! On December 23rd of my senior year I was working at Hallmark and my parents came in wearing their Aggie gear. "We're going to the Holiday Bowl!" my dad had said. "Really?" I asked. "No, but you got into A&M."
I think I rose five feet in the air. They had been checking the website that showed current students and my name popped up. A few days later, my letter came in the mail. It was happening.
I had a very clear picture of what I wanted from A&M. I wanted to join Kappa Theta Beta, the Catholic sorority that my sister-in-law had been in, and I wanted to be involved in something on campus like Fish Aides or CARPOOL. I wanted to make some awesome friends, guy and girlfriends, and meet a handsome, Catholic Corps boy. I wanted to be engaged by the time I graduated and married within a year of graduating. These were my plans.
It's so funny how much things change, how much you evolve, how much I've changed. I had a rough freshman year. I hadn't realized how hard the transition would be for me, coming from a small town that I had lived in since I was three and had had the same friends since about that time. Making new friends didn't come easy to me, and although I did end up making some awesome ones, I still found myself feeling lonely a lot of the time. I didn't get into Fish Aides or CARPOOL and wondered how my brother could be elected yell leader and I couldn't even get into one of these organizations? I did end up joining Kappa Theta Beta which opened the door for me to so many opportunities and friendships at St. Mary's.
I don't want to drone on with a fact by fact overview of exactly how college panned out for me, I just want to talk about how I've changed. I went into college with plans and a closed mind. I had opinions and prejudices and expectations and plans and all of these things have been radically thrown out of the window. The thing that has kept me sane through college has been my faith. I've definitely faltered at times and made some shady decisions, but God always takes me back. The relationships that I have cultivated are what have allowed me to grow. I've kept a solid friendship with Rachel since high school and through her I've met so many different people at UT. I found that I like people that are different and I enjoy being friends with people who have different opinions than my own, something I never valued before meeting these people. I met so many people through volunteering for Breakaway and being an IMPACT counselor who challenged me in my faith and drove me to do the research and soul searching I needed to do to defend my Catholic faith so that I would have a knowledge of what I believed. These people did this out of love and always respected my beliefs, despite our differences. I have learned so much from them. I have found a solid group of bros with whom I could tailgate with, watch sports with, and get boy advice from. I've always related well with boys and am so thankful for these relationships. The people that I owe so much to, who are always there for me to talk to, who provide me with endless encouragement and advice, are my close lady friends. As much as I value my guy friendships, there is something so special about girlfriends because there are so many things about girls that only girls can understand. I have become independent and satisfied with myself because of Pilar's independence, focus, and unconditional love, and I cannot thank her enough for that. I have been made sane in some insane situations because of Katie C's level head. I have been blessed to have been surrounded by so many lovely women. You know who you are, and I am eternally grateful. I think the most important change that I've seen in myself is comfort and satisfaction in who I am and where I am. I used to think happiness could only come from being with a guy and I didn't think this because I'd always been dating a guy, I thought this because I'd NEVER been in a relationship with a guy. I used to look at girls who were graduating single and think, "Oh, poor girl." Now, I have found true happiness and joy in friendships and am treasuring those now while still keeping an open mind about relationships. I mean...I have the rest of my life to be married :)
So here I am, at the end. I graduate in a week and am in a much different position than I imagined I would be. I am so satisfied with my experiences and knowledge gained and I am grateful beyond words for Texas A&M for providing me with this experience. It's so true that God's plans are always so much greater than you could ever imagine. I don't know where he is taking me this year and it's scary, but I know I'll be safe, that he has a plan, that I must keep my head up and my heart open.
I leave you with this song that I listened to on my move up to A&M before my freshman year. I was following my parents and my mom told me (via walkie talkie) to turn to 106.1 because "We Bleed Maroon" was on. I heard it for the first time in a very long time the other day and thought it was a great example of how things have come full circle. Gig'em and God bless :)
http://youtu.be/vsz8sJ68udc
No comments:
Post a Comment