A Perfect Fit!

One week down! It has begun!

I am five days into my first school year as a teacher assuming control of my own class. All of my insecurities, all of my doubts, all of my fears, worries, and questions have been wiped away. I absolutely love what I'm doing! There is no doubt in my mind that I'm in the right profession. I didn't leave school on the first day saying, "What did I get myself into?!" I left a little exhausted, but very excited about the year and the boys. Now, I'm a realist...I know there will be times when I'll feel empty from pouring everything out and there will be hard situations that I will have to face, but I know deep down that this is exactly where I'm supposed to be.

There is so much to teaching that people who have never been in charge of a class would never realize. You have to constantly think on your feet and strategize. If I just tell the boys, "go to your cubbies and get your math book!" then I've lost control for 15 minutes. I've learned to release the boys by which row their cubby is on so that they won't be climbing on top of each other and so that there won't be a huge traffic jam at the cubbies. I also have to be careful about how/how often I answer questions and what type of questions I allow to be asked. I have boys who may as well just sit there with their hand up all the time because they ALWAYS have questions. I also have boys who will just ask random questions and throw everyone off topic. I have to make a decision about whether I am going to answer any questions while I'm giving directions, in the middle of the lesson, etc., and this is a tough decision because sometimes the boys ask really good questions that may help their classmates. These are just a few examples of the things that I always have to be thinking about, and you know what? I love it. I love this constant challenge...that I am not allowed to be mentally lazy at any point during my day. I had to check a Math multiplication fact quiz orally and completely off the top of my head on Friday. It was easy, but still involved a little bit of mental sweat to just go through and call out all of those facts on the spot.

Like I said before, I love all of my boys and am so excited about all of them. I'm not just saying this...it takes a lot for me to dislike a student. I can always find something likeable in children, even if they annoy me. I have been pretty harsh with these boys because...that's the only way to maintain order and my sanity and deep down, the boys appreciate this. Children crave structure even though they'll never admit it. They need structure and routine, and they need adults in their life who will hold them accountable and hold them to high standards while still loving them. It made me feel good to have a parent tell me that her son is really enjoying my class. He told her that he really liked that I took the time to welcome them to my room and tell them "Good Morning!" and that I was glad they were there. Just the fact that those little things meant that much to him made me so happy and makes me always want to make these boys feel special. A good parent disciplines their children out of love and that's exactly what I'm doing with these boys.

Just as a sidenote, I'm already racking up cute stories. On Wednesday after recess, the boys were bouncing off the walls. I told them to all close their eyes and relax. I started talking in a very soothing voice and said, "You're on a beach...." and what did they do? Started yelling, "THERE'S A SHARK!" and "I'm getting sunburned!" Only 10-11 year old boys would go in that direction. It's also just really funny to look at the kind of power I have over them as an authority figure. When they line up and are all chatty, I'll just stand there and stare at them (I hate yelling, so I instill control silently) and pretty soon they'll all start smacking each other and saying, "SSHH! SHE'S LOOKING!" Ahahahaha I love it!

Anyway, I have a lot of grading and planning to do. I also have some napping that needs to be done as well. I'm very excited about this week and weekend! Parent's night is Thursday, I'm headed back to La Grange on Friday for the fair, and Sunday the Ags are going to beat the hell outta SMU!



That is all for now. I want to end with expressing my sincere and utter sadness over the losses of Amber, Brandon, and Tonia. Although I wasn't close to any of them, I grew up with all three of them since Kindergarten. They were very good people and they were taken too soon, but they are having a blast in Heaven right now! My prayers and condolences go to all of their families and friends.

Catching Up

34 days since my last post, 19 days until I move to Houston, 29 days until I assume control of a classroom full of 10-11 year old boys. A lot has happened in the last month and a lot more is going to happen in the next month! Allow me to backtrack.

When I wrote my last post, "Simple Joys", I was staying alone at my house in La Grange, dog and cat sitting for my parents. I was alone for three days while they went to my mom's high school reunion in Beaumont, and then I was alone for eight days while they drove to Little Rock, Memphis, St. Martinsville, and New Orleans. Staying alone has never really bothered me except that there just happened to be a rapist on the loose in La Grange. Anyone who knows La Grange knows that something like this is a scary thing -- there aren't very many people here so it seems it would be easier to become a target. I also live a little out of town, surrounded by woods, and close to train tracks, so it's a pretty scary here at night...not to mention I like to watch scary movies and shows like "I Survived" which do nothing for the imagination. I didn't get raped, obviously. Perhaps it's because I traveled around armed with pepper spray, the remote control to our alarm system, and an arsenal of self defense moves just aching to be used? Or perhaps it's because the dude skipped town?

The positive side of being alone for such a long time is that you really get to know yourself. Being alone here is not the same as living alone in a big city or in college. I'm talking you can go two days without conversing with another human face to face. It really teaches you to be comfortable with yourself, because a person could drive themselves nuts when left alone with their own neurotic thoughts. I just did a lot of talking to myself (and my dog) and God, as well as a lot of reading, running, and relaxing. It was a nice break from the rigors of the world, but it also made me appreciate conversation and ...people.

In the next few weeks we babysat Caroline and Thomas for a few days, a bunch of us went to Travis' lakehouse for the 4th of July (epic), I made some intermittent trips to Houston, I went to a legit math teacher conference in Grapevine, and my family went to the beach sans Pat, Allison, and Parker.

Sidenote: Pat, Allison, Parker, Sully, and Oscar, (the latter are their dog and cat), moved to Owatanna, Minnesota at the beginning of June for an 11 month training program for Pat's new job. It was pretty hard to say goodbye, especially after having lived with them this whole last semester. Thank God for skype, which we will HAVE to do more often, Facebook, and Allison's blog, otherwise I would be having serious issues. It hurts my heart sometimes to watch my sweet little Godson grow up and not be able to hold him, but it will be that much sweeter when they move back to Texas! I'm also lucky to have another little baby nephew to spoil in the meantime :)

So, as I was saying, the last month has been busy. On one of those Houston trips I mentioned, I signed a lease at an apartment and am super stoked about it! I'm not going to say where it is because I don't believe in sharing that sort of thing over the internet, but it's in a great area! I can't wait to buy furniture and decorate -- I absolutely love to decorate -- and be a grown up in the real world with my own place and a real, big girl job! The only thing that stinks is that the soonest I can move in is August 12th which is actually the second day of my new teacher orientation at St. Thomas. Oh yeah, I got a job at St. Thomas' Episcopal School teaching 5th grade boys. I think I forgot to mention that. Hence why I'm moving to Houston! It will be a busy couple of weeks with moving, getting settled, and getting everything ready for the big first day. Some would say that I could just set up the necessities in my apartment and leave the decorating for later, but I can't do that. I'll be up all night that weekend putting things in the right place, hammering, cleaning, etc. Don't try to talk me out of it...I'm a woman on a mission!

I'm going to Houston this week to get some work done in my classroom. I'm going to lock myself in that room and MAKE myself get organized and make some decisions. It's hard to focus on school when I'm so far away and don't have all of my materials. Hopefully this will put my mind at ease.

That is as much catching up as I can do right now. I have a plan for waking up at 7AM and running through the hills on the bluff in La Grange. I want to do a half marathon next spring and need to do some outside running over hills and stuff and not just on a treadmill to see if I have what it takes. I have been doing around three miles a day, but I think it's so different on a treadmill in the A/C than on a windy, steep road in the heat. We shall see. I love having leisurely mornings with coffee and a newspaper and working out after lunch, but that's not how it will be when school starts so this will be a good test!

Simple Joys

 I was sitting there on my favorite spot on my deck, feet dangling over the side, legs rubbing against the scratchy wood, eyes gazing down the hills that roll down to the railroad tracks, down to the lush green trees that surround the creekbeds and river bottoms and stretch out until they rise up the majestic bluff way off in the distance.

I could taste the red wine on my lips and hear the birds sharing their melodic conversations back and forth through the trees, as if they were the dearest of friends catching one another up on their busy lives. The breeze moved through the trees with a delicate rush, gliding through the leaves before tenderly playing in my hair and across my skin. It was a warm breeze, just warm enough to remind me that it's summer, but not too warm that it was oppressive. This breeze was indeed the opposite of oppressive, it was refreshing. It was rejuvinating. It met me with such a beautiful urgency that I reclined my head back, closed my eyes, and melted in the warm embrace of a breeze that I believe was meant to comfort me.

Just a few minutes prior to basking in this lovely encounter with nature, I had been singing one of my new favorite songs, "40 Dogs" by Bob Schneider, aloud out there on that deck. I stopped singing it only to, out of nowhere, start singing "If you're happy and you know it clap your hands!". There was no subconscious reason for me to start singing this song; I hadn't sung this song in years. I think the only explanation was the true, authentic, overflow of contentment, comfort, and happiness I was feeling in that moment. A huge smile broke across my face and I just gave in, sitting on that deck, swaying to my own voice, singing a song originally meant to bring joy to children. I think there is a lot to be said for having a child-like joy. Children find joy in the simple things and that is exactly what I did this evening on that deck...I found joy in the simplicity of an evening outside with the intricacies of God's creation.

Perfect for Summer Salad

I usually don't post recipes on here, but I made the most delicious summer salad yesterday and just had to share it. I had been reading Cooking Light magazine and was inspired to go to HEB and buy a whole bunch of fruits and veggies that I could throw together and eat all at once. What I came up with was incredible.

Ingredients
1 peach
1 cucumber
1 large mango, barely ripe
1 small tomato
1 red onion
cilantro
3 chicken breast filets

Dressing:
Extra virgin olive oil
Red wine vinegar
Mustard
Honey
Lemon juice

Directions

1. Preheat skillet on low-medium heat
2. Season chicken filets (both sides) with olive oil first, then Nature's Seasoning, garlic, celery salt, poultry seasoning, and whatever else you like to use. I usually just grab whatever I feel like using. I really like Adobo for chicken but my parents didn't have any of that.
3. Cook chicken until done and stick in fridge to cool.
4. Cut red onion into long, thin, slices, as thin as possible. Heat EVOO in a different skillet from the one you used for chicken over low heat. Place red onion slices in skillet and cook slowly until carmelized. (I only used half the onion. It just depends on how much you like onions as to how much you use.)
5. While onion is carmelizing, chop cucumber, peach, mango, and tomatoes into small, bite sized pieces and place in bowl. Pull cilantro off stalk and throw into bowl (I probably used about 20 cilantro leaves, just use as you see fit.)
6. Once chicken has cooled, chop into bite sized pieces and mix into bowl with fruit. Add onions once they're finished carmelizing (they should be soft/barely crispy and taste sweet) and stir salad together.

For the dressing, I didn't use measurements, I just did everything to taste. I also only made enough for one serving and put it on my salad as I ate it so that I could store the salad and it wouldn't get soggy. There is a majority of EVOO, only a squirt of mustard, a squirt of honey, a quarter of a lemon, and about a teaspoon of vinegar. Apple cider vinegar is preferred but we were out. This dressing concoction was complements of the lovely Pilar Mckay :)

Here is how mine turned out!

To make it sweeter, you may substitute a strawberry for the tomato and to spice it up you could add or substitute a red bell pepper!

As a side, I had grapes and Parmesan Garlic Triscuit Thin Crisps.

The drink is a Salty Dog:

-Grapefruit juice

-Vodka

-Twist of lime

-Salt on the rim

Perfect pairing!

Very healthy and refreshing meal, perfect for a picnic or just a hot summer evening! Let me know what you think!

Covered with Love

Sometimes it's hard for me to love. I mean this as a pretty broad statement that applies to the broad definition of love. My favorite definition of love is the one Marcel LeJeune always uses, that true love is doing what is best for another person regardless of the cost to yourself. So when I say that sometimes it's hard for me to love, I don't really mean that it's hard for me to be nice to people, I mean that it's hard sometimes to always do what is best for everyone...including myself.

This could be something as simple as offering to cook or doing the dishes for my parents. They do those things so selflessly and never ask me to, and it rarely even crosses my mind to offer that sort of help. I want to always be thinking of ways that I can help them and others. It could also mean something deeper, like understanding God's plan in my life and still loving him even when it seems that he's holding some pretty great things back from me. I know that his plans for me are incredible and that I can't even imagine what great things he has planned, as evidenced by my current opportunities and blessings that I never would have imagined a few years ago, so in the meantime I am called to love him and the people in my life. I think I see some self improvement goals in the works :)

I was doing some painting the other day so I pulled out my little art supply bag and found one of my books by Max Lucado called A Love Worth Giving. I keep that book in there because it has some great quotes that I've often used as encouragement for friends and for myself. Max Lucado is so eloquent and gifted with words and he always seems to be able to bring me comfort with how he writes about God's love. Here is one of my favorite quotes:

"Why did Jesus do that? There is only one answer. And that answer has one word. Love. And the love of Christ "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (1 Cor. 13:7).

Think about that for a moment. Drink from that for a moment. Drink deeply. Don't just sip or nip. It's time to gulp. It's time to let his love cover all things in your life. All secrets. All hurts, All hours of evil, minutes of worry.

The mornings you awoke in the bed of a stranger? His love will cover that. The years you peddled prejudice and pride? His love will cover that. Every promise broken, drug taken, penny stolen. Every cross word, cuss word, and harsh word. His love covers all things.

Let it. Discover along with the psalmist: "He...loads me with love and mercy" (Ps. 103:4). Picture a giant dump truck full of love. There you are behind it. God lifts the bed until the love starts to slide. Slowly at first, then down, down, down, until you are hidden, buried, covered in his love.

"Hey, where are you?" someone asks.
"In here, covered in love."

Let his love cover all things.
Do it for his sake. To the glory of his name.
Do it for your sake. For the peace of your heart.
And do it for their sake. For the people in your life. Let his love fall on you so yours can fall on them."

Spring Break Cruise: The Last Leg

I'm just going to sum up the last few days of our cruise in this post because if I keep breaking it up I'm never going to finish and I'm going to forget more than I already have.

When I left you last, we were wrapping up a lovely St. Patty's day. The next morning we landed at our last destination: Cozumel. Pilar and I got up bright and early so that we could make the most of our day on land, while the boys chose to sleep in and stay on the boat since they had already been to Cozumel on their previous cruise. It did make me a little nervous to go into Mexico without the boys...by a little, I mean a lot. My mother watches endless episodes of Forensic Files and Cold Case and is always reading the Debbie Downer stories out of the newspaper about girls who got kidnapped/raped so she has passed that paranoia on to me BIG TIME. I wasn't going to let the boys know that I was nervous about them not going with us -they needed their rest- but you better believe that I was doing a mental review of all of my self defense moves the whole walk down the pier. Pilar assured me that we had nothing to worry about, that all of those sketchy things happen in sketchy places, not in the highly populated tourist areas. The devil's advocate in me kept saying that this was probably the perfect place for creepers to linger, just waiting to prey on a naive, young, American girl with her guard down.

Pilar and I made our way into the market area that was right off the pier and started walking toward where we figured some cabs would be waiting. Our only sketchy run-in was with a white guy who had rented a car and told us he could give us a ride to a beach. He had no credentials and was too insistent to not set off about 500 red flags in my mind. I got us the HELL away from him and latched on to a family that was heading toward the big cab drop off/pick up. This is where I was very thankful for Pilar's fluent Spanish. She was able to speak clearly with the cab drivers which put me at ease as, of course, I was assuming that everyone wanted to kidnap us and sell us into the international sex trade. Another big nerve easer was that we shared a cab with a family. The cab driver turned out to be super nice and convinced us to go to another beach that was a lot nicer than the one we had planned on going to. He also cut our rate down a little.

The beach we went to in Cozumel was very nice. It had nice lounge chairs, a restaraunt, and waiters who walked up and down the beach delivering food and drinks. Pilar and I just lounged, swam when we got hot, and soaked up our last day on a beautiful beach.

We stayed out there for three or four hours and then made our way back to the pier. Once back at the little marketplace, we did a little shopping, Pilar did a little bartering, and we set out for the ship for the last time. We spent the rest of the afternoon laying out with the boys and then went through our usual routine of showering/napping/getting ready for the night. On this night, Pilar and Travis performed "Hips Don't Lie" by Shakira at karaoke and did a wonderful job, despite what they may tell you. We went out to the Lido deck of the ship after karaoke and made our own little dance party...we're really good at that :)

After our dance party we went back to the room and looked at the stars for a little while and all ended up falling asleep. Eventually, the boys went back to their room and we all went to bed.

The next day was Friday, our last "Fun day at sea". We laid out all day, cooking ourselves to a nice crisp. Friday night we went to the "Carnival Legends" show in the Ivanhoe Theater and watched all of the cruise guests who had been chosen to impersonate different celebrities like Elvis, Madonna, Johnny Cash, etc. One of the guys we met was impersonating Ricky Martin. The show was pretty impressive. After the show, we spent some time out on the deck again and enjoyed the beautiful night. This was the night that the moon was the brightest it had been in like 200 years (or whatever it was). The light was incredible! It was a little sad to think that this was our last night, but we didn't let that stop us from soaking it all in.

The next day was a series of packing, debarking from the ship, making our way back to the car, and leaving Miami. Although we were dreading the 17 hour car ride back to Houston, we were also thankful that we still had some time together and wouldn't just be thrown right back into reality. Again, I give mad props to our manly men for beasting the last leg of our journey. Somewhere between Miami and Houston, I decided that I would try to make the drive back to Austin at 2am in order to be able to teach my kiddos on Monday morning. I crushed a red bull and made it to La Grange, but I started hallucinating outside of La Grange and decided that I couldn't go another hour and a half on the remaining fumes from my red bull. I stopped and slept in La Grange and made it back to Cedar Park in time for lunch.

I had such an incredible time on this cruise. I was able to get in some incredible lady time with my little Pilar before she goes off to med school and I sell my soul to my class of 5th grade boys. I also got two great friends in Travis and Chris who I look forward to hanging out with more since we will all be in Houston next year!

Spring Break Cruise: Part VI

(I've been slacking on my cruise posts, but I'm planning on getting them all finished in the next few days so that I won't wait too long and start forgetting things!)

Beautiful Belize and St. Patty's Day!

We awoke bright and early on a cloudy 17th of March....aka St. Patty's Day! Pilar and I quickly suited up, ate our breakfast (room service actually arrived on this day) and headed down to the nightclub to meet up with the boys and with the rest of the people who were going on the snorkeling excursion. Once we had all arrived, we made our way down to the bottom of the ship and boarded the double decker boat that would taxi us to our snorkeling site. As I mentioned, it was a little cloudy and chilly since it was around 8:30am, and there were intermittent rain showers. These factors did not do anything to help my nerves. It may sound silly, but I get really nervous about the smallest things, and this was one of them. I was nervous the water would be cold, nervous I would inhale the water, nervous I would panic, nervous I would get seasick as my brother had when he snorkeled (and we share the same motion sickness issues). Needless to say, I was a little nervous.

Our tour guides on the boat were awesome Belize natives with very thick Jamaican-like accents. They were pretty funny, too. They distributed our snorkles, flippers, and life jackets as we approached our destination. Once we arrived, they gave us the go ahead to jump on in to the water. I followed Pilar out and eased my way on in...and the water was perfect! I fumbled around a little bit, trying to figure out how to breathe and how to make my mask comfortable, and once I got it, I was off. I stayed with Pilar and the guys for a little while, but I soon found myself so completely amazed by all of the life under the water that I ventured way off by myself. I can't explain how awesome it was being out there under the water and seeing the different types of exotic fish and vegetation. I found myself praying a lot while a swam around. This was such an incredible example of just how small we are and how vast God is, that there is an entire world under the ocean that we rarely experience. It was funny, because I would be peaceful and prayerful, and then I would see a cool fish or some colorful coral and would think, "That's fu***** awesome!" I don't generally use a lot of profanity, but this would pop right into my head, and I think that will suffice to say how beautiful it was under those turquoise blue waters.

I think I snorkeled for about an hour and a half or so and then happened upon Pilar on my way back to the boat. We both got back on and ran into Chris who had ended his snorkeling early due to motion sickness issues. There is so much irony in the fact that I NEVER got seasick at any point on the cruise but Chris and Travis both had issues with it. Poor little guys. Anyway, we turned our gear back in and headed to the second deck of the boat for some sun and some rum punch. The sun had come out by this point and our tour guides had graciously made some delicious rum punch for all of us. This was one of my favorite parts of the cruise...sitting atop this boat, gliding over gleaming turquoise-colored waters with the wind flying through my hair, sipping on rum punch, and listening to 90's music. I was sitting next to a really nice older couple from Canada (Pilar and I found that we only ended up meeting older people...not really sure what this says about us,) but this couple was really cool.

By the time we made it back to the ship, we were all in a pretty good mood and I especially was ready to start celebrating St. Patty's day with a Long Island in the hot tub. We did precisely this, and had full access to the hot tubs since everyone on the ship had left to explore Belize. We had decided that the snorkeling would be our only exploration in Belize, espeically since the boys had been there the year before and had said that there really wasn't much to see on land. I believe we made a great decision by staying on the ship because we had pretty much the whole thing to ourselves. We just lounged and enjoyed the incredible water and relaxing day for the rest of the afternoon. Chris worked out and then passed out in the cutest little bear cub position...

I woke up from my sun induced coma just in time to snap a pic of Pilar and Travis mid coma...

And this is what the view from the hot tub looked like:

After our lovely day in the sun, we returned to our rooms, showered, and napped. We joined the boys for dinner...lovely as always, and then headed back up to our room to prepare for our St. Patty's day festivities. I had come prepared with a lime green flashing necktie that I loaned to Chris and I was already wearing a green dress, so Chris and I were safe. Travis decided to safety pin a green apple onto his shirt and fasten some green shot glasses to his head that he would later use to borrow drinks from strangers. Pilar decided to take part of our green luggage tag and pin that onto her dress. We definitely looked ready to party.

We headed down to the piano bar where we enjoyed some lovely "Blue Islands" ...a stronger, much more intense version of a Long Island. We downed a few of those puppies and were good to go. It didn't help our situation that the ship was experiencing some pretty turbulent waters, so it became hard to gauge just how much fun we were having. We met up with Quyen, one of our friends from UMASS, got some seats around the piano, and had a blast. I always enjoy piano bar and this time was no exception! We decided to head over to the nightclub and dance the rest of the night away. This was a great idea, as always, especially when they played Zombie Nation as well as a ton of other ragetastic songs! After a few hours of raging and a missing Travis, we headed back up to the room. Chris recovered Travis outside of their room and we all retired to our quarters. There are many more interesting stories to go along with this night, but unfortunately, I must protect myself and my friends from embarrassment. Needless to say, we had a BLAST!

Next stop: Cozumel!

There's a place in my heart...

I have to begin this by thanking Pilar for inspiring me to write something about my experiences at A&M. I've been wanting to do this for a while and after reading her blog, I think now is the time.



To say that I was born an Aggie would be the understatement of the century. To say that I "bleed maroon" or that I've been raised a die hard Aggie would be like saying that Mother Teresa was a good lady. These would all be major understatements.

My dad has had season tickets since the early eighties...same section, same row, same seats, with the same person: one of his college roommates, Gilbert. We would always rotate who got to go with Dad that week (my mom or brothers usually won) or sometimes we would luck out and get extra seats and would all get to go. At this point, I loved A&M because my parents loved A&M, because my brothers loved A&M, and I loved all of them, so I loved A&M. I stood tall when we were on a losing streak which, let's face it, has happened more than we would have liked in recent years. I never faltered, never jumped on the other team's bandwagon no matter how many of my friends did. We would go to basketball games and baseball games and no matter how bored I got, I always appreciated the atmosphere and warm environment. We bundled for the cold football games. We layered for the Independence Bowl in Shreveport when the Ags played Mississippi State and lost in double overtime after a few inches of snow and a very cold and almost frostbitten 9-year-old Rebecca. I had already experienced a great deal of Aggieland at this point. And then Mark entered his fish year at A&M.

Mark is my oldest brother, almost eight years my senior. I was in fifth grade when he came to A&M and joined the Corps of Cadets, Company L-1. My cousin, Kevin, was a senior in L-1 which made Mark's decision to join. This was an entirely new experience for all of us and I became obsessed. All I talked about was Mark and the Corps. He was my hero, so brave for enduring such hardship and never complaining. He was so old and grown up for already being in college and was just so....cool. We went to all of his Corps events: reviews, barbecues, football game march ins, and receptions. He joined Parson's Mounted Cavalry his sophomore year and helped turn the program around with the help of his classmates. His senior year he was Executive Officer of the Cavalry and of L-1 and by this time he had made incredible, lifetime friends and had matured into a confident, successful man. I couldn't have been more proud of him.

Patrick is my second oldest brother by five years. He was not as sure about joining the Corps as Mark had been, but decided to in the end. His fish year was Mark's senior year, so they had one year together. Pat blossomed throughout his time at A&M and in the Corps. This was his place, where he was meant to be. He was chosen to be guide on bearer for his outfit, which meant that he was in charge of carrying and protecting their flag, a much more daunting task than it sounds as these outfits like to steal each other's flags. The biggest thing to happen to him occured in the spring of his sophomore year. Patrick was elected to be a junior yell leader. This experience was huge for him and for our entire family. It was like he was royalty...instantly famous among Aggies. We were opened to a whole new world full of experiences including marching down the streets of campus in the torchlight parade before midnight yell practice and then entering a stadium of thousands of screaming people through a tunnel on the arm of one of the people that they were ALL waiting for. It was incredible. As a sophomore in high school, this was probably about THE coolest thing that ever could have happened to me. Patrick was also chosen to be a Ross Volunteer, head yell leader, a class agent, and was voted the outstanding senior in the Corps of Cadets his senior year. On top of all of this, Patrick had been very involved with St. Mary's Catholic Church and had always talked about Aggie Awakening. He was always striving to be a good example to his underclassmen and to the rest of the student body as he was an ambassador for A&M. I was a junior in high school when Patrick was a senior at A&M and had grown to be friends with his buddies as we were a little closer in age than Mark and I. It was a lot more emotional for me to watch all of them graduate because I had watched them evolve from shy, timid, bald, scrawny freshmen into secure, confident, mature seniors and I knew things would never be the same with everyone gathered at the outfit barbecue or all the guys hanging out in Pat's room or summer house because they would all scatter to different cities. I also knew I was next in line.

Whether or not I would go to A&M was never a question. I wanted to go to A&M because I wanted to go there, not because my parents wanted me to go there (they did, of course) but because it was my decision. I couldn't imagine going anywhere else and I didn't apply anywhere else. I would go to A&M right off the bat and if I couldn't get in, I would go to Blinn and transfer. That was that. Fortunately, I got in! On December 23rd of my senior year I was working at Hallmark and my parents came in wearing their Aggie gear. "We're going to the Holiday Bowl!" my dad had said. "Really?" I asked. "No, but you got into A&M."

I think I rose five feet in the air. They had been checking the website that showed current students and my name popped up. A few days later, my letter came in the mail. It was happening.

I had a very clear picture of what I wanted from A&M. I wanted to join Kappa Theta Beta, the Catholic sorority that my sister-in-law had been in, and I wanted to be involved in something on campus like Fish Aides or CARPOOL. I wanted to make some awesome friends, guy and girlfriends, and meet a handsome, Catholic Corps boy. I wanted to be engaged by the time I graduated and married within a year of graduating. These were my plans.

It's so funny how much things change, how much you evolve, how much I've changed. I had a rough freshman year. I hadn't realized how hard the transition would be for me, coming from a small town that I had lived in since I was three and had had the same friends since about that time. Making new friends didn't come easy to me, and although I did end up making some awesome ones, I still found myself feeling lonely a lot of the time. I didn't get into Fish Aides or CARPOOL and wondered how my brother could be elected yell leader and I couldn't even get into one of these organizations? I did end up joining Kappa Theta Beta which opened the door for me to so many opportunities and friendships at St. Mary's.

I don't want to drone on with a fact by fact overview of exactly how college panned out for me, I just want to talk about how I've changed. I went into college with plans and a closed mind. I had opinions and prejudices and expectations and plans and all of these things have been radically thrown out of the window. The thing that has kept me sane through college has been my faith. I've definitely faltered at times and made some shady decisions, but God always takes me back. The relationships that I have cultivated are what have allowed me to grow. I've kept a solid friendship with Rachel since high school and through her I've met so many different people at UT. I found that I like people that are different and I enjoy being friends with people who have different opinions than my own, something I never valued before meeting these people. I met so many people through volunteering for Breakaway and being an IMPACT counselor who challenged me in my faith and drove me to do the research and soul searching I needed to do to defend my Catholic faith so that I would have a knowledge of what I believed. These people did this out of love and always respected my beliefs, despite our differences. I have learned so much from them. I have found a solid group of bros with whom I could tailgate with, watch sports with, and get boy advice from. I've always related well with boys and am so thankful for these relationships. The people that I owe so much to, who are always there for me to talk to, who provide me with endless encouragement and advice, are my close lady friends. As much as I value my guy friendships, there is something so special about girlfriends because there are so many things about girls that only girls can understand. I have become independent and satisfied with myself because of Pilar's independence, focus, and unconditional love, and I cannot thank her enough for that. I have been made sane in some insane situations because of Katie C's level head. I have been blessed to have been surrounded by so many lovely women. You know who you are, and I am eternally grateful. I think the most important change that I've seen in myself is comfort and satisfaction in who I am and where I am. I used to think happiness could only come from being with a guy and I didn't think this because I'd always been dating a guy, I thought this because I'd NEVER been in a relationship with a guy. I used to look at girls who were graduating single and think, "Oh, poor girl." Now, I have found true happiness and joy in friendships and am treasuring those now while still keeping an open mind about relationships. I mean...I have the rest of my life to be married :)

So here I am, at the end. I graduate in a week and am in a much different position than I imagined I would be. I am so satisfied with my experiences and knowledge gained and I am grateful beyond words for Texas A&M for providing me with this experience. It's so true that God's plans are always so much greater than you could ever imagine. I don't know where he is taking me this year and it's scary, but I know I'll be safe, that he has a plan, that I must keep my head up and my heart open.

I leave you with this song that I listened to on my move up to A&M before my freshman year. I was following my parents and my mom told me (via walkie talkie) to turn to 106.1 because "We Bleed Maroon" was on. I heard it for the first time in a very long time the other day and thought it was a great example of how things have come full circle. Gig'em and God bless :)

http://youtu.be/vsz8sJ68udc

Spring Break Cruise: Part V

Stop numba two: Mahogany Bay, Isla Roatan, Honduras

After our time crunch in the Caymans, we decided to set more than one alarm in order to get up at a decent hour and make the most of our Wednesday in Honduras. We landed a little later on this day than we had in the Caymans, arriving around 10 AM. At this point in the trip, we had been in the sun pretty much constantly for two entire days, so we spent extra time applying sunscreen to our already burned selves. Once lathered, we headed down to breakfast and to a spectacular view of Honduras!

After breakfast, we headed down to debark from the ship. From what we could tell, Mahogany Bay was made specifically to be a destination for cruise lines. The ship pulled right up to the dock, so there were no taxi boats involved. We sauntered down the dock admiring the scenery and looking forward to another lovely day on the beach. As we neared land (the dock was really long) we started to hear an Usher song drifting over from one of the restaraunts. This was entertaining to us since we were in practically a third world country surrounded by beautiful and exotic vegetation and it still had somehow managed to be Americanized. Despite this fact, I was happy, because it meant I could dancewalk.

Those who constructed this port were very business savvy because you had to walk through a souvenier shop to get to the beach. On another tangent, this souvenier shop housed ample amounts of liquor at very competitive prices. There was a display for Crown that was being sold at two bottles for $35. I still regret not stocking up because I loooooove me some Crown. Anyway, we were anxious for more beach times, so we scooted out of the souvenier shop, through the very Americanized outdoor mall area and down the path to the beach. It was a lovely walk through trees and over bridges with the scent of exotic flowers wafting through the air. I had had a sneaking suspicion that the beach would be crowded, judging from the droves of people that were walking in with us and the fact that there was another cruise ship docked as well.

My suspicions were accurate. The beach was small and packed. It was wider than the seven mile beach in the Caymans but was not near as long. It also had a lot more palm trees and was loaded with lounge chairs, which was nice. I just think after having space to stretch out at our last beach, we were a little disappointed by the fact that we were practically on each others laps were pretty sure the beach was man-made. We were finally able to find two loungers next to each other (no way we could have found four) and set our stuff down. The boys wanted to take a walk down the beach and walk down the dock that was a little ways down the beach so we joined them. We hung out on the dock for a little while and then decided to head back to our chairs and take a dip in the water while the boys explored the uncharted territory on the other side of the dock. We had surmised that there may have been another beach on the other side of that forbidden forest so Travis and Chris set off on their own little bro journey. Unfortunately, it was short-lived. Their intentions were discovered by a beach cop and they were sent back to lounge with the commoners.

Despite the downsides of this beach, it was still lovely. The water was a beautiful greenish blue and was a perfect temperature. We also happened upon two little boys who had a football which was pretty clutch as we had regretted not bringing our own football.

You can see Trav out there rocking the shirt because of the horrible sunburn on his back. Poor guy :(

We played with them for quite a while (another regret of mine was wearing a strapless bikini top which hindered my ability to dive and tackle as freely as usual.) After a group of bohunks took over our football game, Chris and I headed to the beach bar for a beer and a hurricane while Pilar and Travis enjoyed coconut water straight from the coconut. All of our beverages were delicious :) We spent the rest of the day lounging under the shade trees and eventually headed back to the shopping area where I bought a cute little multicolored purse which I have been using ever since. Once this was purchased, we were headed back to the boat.

This night was another pretty chill night. We went to dinner and then went to see a magic show in the Ivanhoe Theater. I believe we also went to watch some karaoke. We went to bed fairly early because we had a snorkeling excursion at 8:30AM the next morning AND the next day was St. Patty's day. We knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that we would want to be verrry well rested for St. Patty's day!

Stay tuned :)

Spring Break Cruise: Part IV

First stop: Grand Cayman!

"Pilar...what time is it?"

"I don't know, let me look at my phone. It can't be later than 9AM because that's what I set my alarm for...uh oh..."

"What?"

"Phone's dead...and it's 10:45!"

Allow me to backtrack. Today was our third day on the cruise and the first day to dock at a port, this one was Grand Cayman, in the Cayman Islands. The ship docked at 8AM, and we had put out our order for room service for breakfast the night before, so we had planned on waking up, getting ready, and eating breakfast quickly while giving the crowds leaving the ship time to die down. We had also assumed that our cruise director would come over the intercom with a "Good morning!" greeting as he had done the previous day. This did not happen, nor did our breakfast arrive.

We frantically got up and called the boys and then threw on our clothes and headed down to breakfast. We wolfed down our food and hightailed it off the ship. We had to take a boat from the ship to the island and made it to the island around 11:30. Our first order of business was to find a watch so that we could keep up with the ship time and make it back before the ship left. In case you've never cruised before, if you don't make it back to the ship on time, they'll just leave you. You have to pay out of your butt to get back to the ship and we didn't have enough money in our butts to consider doing that. Ipso facto, we needed a watch, Chris needed shades, and I needed some rum for my padre. (Here goes another tangent...)

Upon my leaving La Grange, my dad did some research on rum in the Caribbean. He discovered that out of all of the stops we would be making, the best rum would be found in the Caymans and would be called Seven Fathoms. This was his only request and since he paid for my trip, I felt obliged to honor his request. This is, yet another reason why our lateness was stressing me out.

Once we reached the shopping area which was right inside of the port, I hightailed it into the liquor store and was told that the rum I sought could be found in the original Seven Fathoms distillery which was two blocks down. We made our way down the busy street, dodging taxi recruiters and found the rustic looking little house that said "Seven Fathoms" on the front. There were two doors, neither of which looked very inviting, but we opened one of them anyway. This wasn't a store by any means, it was more of a workshop-looking place. We asked the people inside where we could purchase some Seven Fathoms rum and they told us to go around to the back and up the stairs. I forgot to mention that this place was right on the water and had a pretty cute little outside bar area attached to the back of it. We meandered around and up the stairs and opened the door to, yet another room that was not a public place where rum could be purchased. There was a guy sitting with a huge barrel and was running rum through a filter into the barrel. There was another guy in the other room who told us to go back downstairs to a little hut where a lady would be selling the rum. After venturing back downstairs, we finally found the place where we needed to go to buy the rum. There was a very nice lady who sold me the much sought after Seven Fathoms and I breathed a sigh of relief, grateful to have this beverage for my daddy. Rum in hand, we ventured off to find a taxi and head down to the seven mile beach.

After a quick ride with our spunky little British cab driver, we had arrived at the beach. We had already glimpsed the water from our boat ride from the ship, but nothing could prepare us for the beautiful white sands and sparkling, crystal clear waters. Since we were on the seven mile beach, we had plenty of space to find our own spot where we wouldn't be surrounded on all sides by our fellow cruisers. We laid down our towels, lathered up in sun screen, caught some rays, and then got in the water.

THE WATER! The water was this incredible shade of light turquoisey aqua blue but was also crystal clear while you were in it. It literally was more clear than a swimming pool. We floated and swam and played and frolicked and just drank in the fact that we were in the Cayman freaking Islands.

After enjoying this beautiful beach for a few hours, we made our way back to the port and were back on the ship in no time. Because of all of the hectic activities that happened earlier in the day, we decided to chill and watch "The Town" in our room (great movie!).

The rest of the night was pretty chill. We were still exhausted, if you couldn't tell....

We went to dinner and then spent some time at the piano bar, which was awesome and was the source of much entertainment a little later in the cruise. If I remember correctly, this was the night that we saw the comedian perform in the Eagles Lounge. I believe it was not too much longer after this that we retired to our quarters.

Next stop: Mahogany Bay, Isla Roatan, Honduras!

Spring Break Cruise: Part III

Part III: Fun Day at Sea

I awoke to the sounds of Pilar stirring and a dark room. It wasn't until I felt the slight rocking of the ship and looked around that I remembered I wasn't dreaming....we were actually in this incredible room on board an awesome cruise ship sailing full steam ahead through the Atlantic. Before Pilar had a chance to open the shade, I grabbed the camera in order to give others the full effect of the room. Unfortunately, this blog won't let me upload that video for some reason. Just imagine waking up in a dark room and then someone hitting a switch and you hear "vvrrrrrrrr" as light streams in, and then there is the wide open ocean!

Pilar and I lathered up in sunscreen and our bathing suits and headed down to join the boys for breakfast. After a hearty buffet meal, we set out to find four available lounge chairs together....a daunting task. Since laying out was the popular option for the day seeing as how most people on the ship were pasty northerners, there were few available loungers. (Mid revision, Pilar reminded me that a great deal of the northerners were not indeed pasty, they were orange from their artificial preparation. The exception to this fake bake rule was the occasional chubby, middle-aged, speedo adorned, hairy man.) We did eventually happen upon a stack of chairs and were able to soak in the rays together.

Our location at this point was on the very top deck right behind the waterslide so obviously we found ourselves shooting down the slide. It was a pretty legit slide. Post waterslide shenanigans we witnessed a hairy chest contest. Yes...men who felt they had competitively hairy chests volunteered their talents in a contest that tested hair texture, hair smell, and dancing abilities. There were three female judges with ages ranging from early twenties to early seventies, and God bless these ladies. We were very entertained throughout the duration of this contest. Ironically, we still had an appetite when it finished so we headed down for lunch.

After lunch, Chris and Travis decided to beast it in the work out facilities while Pilar and I decided to return to our sun deck and enjoy cocktails. See!

I was lucky enough to happen upon a couple who had a bracket for the NCAA tournament and got to take a gander at all of the match ups. One of the sacrifices I made for the cruise was not putting together a bracket for March Madness....but seeing as how my spring break the previous year consisted of sitting in front of a TV watching basketball all week and talking trash to my friends about their brackets, I felt that a cruise would be a better trade off. We were even able to catch some of the games on TV when the TBS channel was working. Anyway, we caught the last of the rays coupled with residual beer and cigarette smoke from the feisty UMASS spring breakers next to us and then headed back to the room for our naps and showers.

This night on the cruise was our first formal night, so Pilar and I put extra effort into our beauty preparations (psh, as if that were needed). Our lovely, strapping men came to our room and escorted us down for cocktails. There was a happy hour in the casino/lounge part of the ship (and by happy hour they mean that instead of $10 the drinks were $6...ok maybe that's an exaggeration but drinks were pretty expensive.) We finished our drinks, then took some lovely formal pictures, and headed down to dinner.

As we strolled into the dining room, all of us looking like a million bucks, I commented on the grand Titanic-like stairwell that led down to the main part of the dining room. I said, "Wouldn't it be funny if we acted like Jack and Rose?" I didn't even get through that sentence before Travis and Chris hustled down the stairs and waited at the bottom for Pilar and me. We glided down the stairs and met our boys who met us with smiles and kisses on our hands. It was like something out of...well...Titanic. (Travis and I continued this reinactment every night at dinner and towards the end of the cruise, when people would see us coming, they would turn around and watch our grand entrance. It was pretty sweet.)

Dinner was lovely, as usual. We were entertained for the first time with a show put on by all of our waiters dancing on tables. I don't remember which song they danced to this night, but one of the songs was "Jai Ho" and another was "Apple Bottom Jeans". These waiters were pretty good dancers! After dinner we headed back to the room for some wine and a brief photo shoot and then we moved on to Latin dancing night. There was a band in one of the rooms playing all different kids of Latin music including salsa, cumbia, merengue, etc. Pilar gave us all dancing lessons and we traded off dancing with sitting and watching the smooooth older Colombian man with the legendary mustache work his magic. We stayed here most of the night and then headed back down to the club for more dancing. After dancing until our feet were ready to wither, we headed back to the room to have a quick gaze at the stars and then headed to bed around 4 AM. This was a very smart decision, considering we were arriving at Grand Cayman at 8AM.

"Oh well...we'll set an alarm and surely they'll come over the loudspeakers as a wake-up call."
...or so we thought!

...to be continued...

Spring Break Cruise: Part II

Part II: Come Sail Away!

Our excitement built as we rounded the hallways that brought us closer and closer to boarding the ship. Finally...we were on! They snapped a quick picture of each of us that they would use each time we entered and exited the ship and then we were free to go find our rooms.

Pilar and I had an ocean view room, which meant our room had a window, while the boys were in an interior room. We walked down, down, down the hallway on the ninth floor, made a left, and boom! There was our room on the right, next to a lovely, floor to ceiling sized painting of a beautiful beach. We opened the door expecting to walk into a pretty nice room with a small square window and two beds. What we saw rocked our worlds! Not only did we have a sitting area with a couch, coffee table, minifridge, wet bar, etc, we had a window that took up the entire far wall and overlooked the BOW OF THE SHIP! We could sit in front of that window and have a panoramic view of the open ocean. The window also had an automatic blackout shade complete with a switch for moving it up and down. So legit!

So, after drooling over our room for a little while, we joined the boys for a little meal, went to our emergency drill, and then donned our bathing suits and headed to the "sail away party". We were very lucky that our rooms were on the same floor as the Lido Deck which had the dining rooms with all the buffet lines and 24 hour food places as well as the swimming pools, hot tubs, bars...basically it was where all of the action happened during the day. Pilar and I were on such a mission to get our long islands at this point that not even the mob dancing to the Cupid Shuffle could get in our way! Finally, long islands in hand, we headed up to watch the ship debark from Miami. After a little while the boys met up with us and we had our first official toast on the cruise as a group!

We soaked in the last of the rays and enjoyed some hot tub times before heading back to the room and getting cleaned up for dinner. We were lucky to have the later dinner time at 8:15pm, especially since we could never seem to make it on time even then. Our table was on the bottom level of the beautiful Lincoln Dining Room. We had a booth on the edge of the room which was great because we were still a part of the action, but had our privacy at the same time. We had the same waiter every night, Jose, who was from El Salvador. He was always very cheerful and provided us with great service. The food offered and served at dinner was incredible as well. There was always a great selection and it was always fresh and well prepared. We did have the fortune of sitting at the table next to Sarah Palin's voice twin who spoke very loud and about things like poopy diapers. It definitely added a little something!

After dinner, we headed back up to our room where we made a toast to the night and then we headed down to the Eagles Lounge for karaoke. Pilar and I are seasoned karaoke singers, so we jumped at the opportunity and signed up to sing "Faithfully" by Journey. Unfortunately, I had to use the ladies room which was pretty far down the hall, and they called us before I got back. Travis stood in for me and did a fantastic job, especially for not knowing how the song went, but insisted I replace him when I arrived back. Pilar and I finished strong, I believe, and captivated the audience with our glowing stage presence. When we tired of karaoke, we headed over to the club to dance a jig. Now, I had some preconceived ideas about how a club on a cruise ship was going to be, but those ideas were DEAD WRONG! The DJ in this club was one of the best I've ever heard. He played an awesome mix of new and old music that made us never want to leave the dance floor! Pilar and I were very lucky to have two very good dancers accompanying us, so it was always hard to leave the club at night. After a few hours of shaking a leg, we retired to our quarters.

Fun day at sea tomorrow!

...to be continued....

Spring Break Cruise: Part I

As promised, I'm going to write about our cruise partly so that everyone will know how AWESOME it was and partly so that I can remember all the little details that made it so memorable :)

Part I: The Drive

The story begins on Friday, March 11th. I finished teaching for the day and headed down to La Grange to wait out the Houston traffic. I got a pedicure with my Madre and then hit the road headed for H town. I met Pilar at our friend Katie Mac's house and had a fantastic dinner with her and her parents. That was such a pleasant surprise...Katie's parents were a riot and I'm so glad I got to see her before we left! After dinner we headed over to Travis' house where he and Chris were waiting. (Travis and Chris are Pilar's friends from her years at St. Thomas Episcopal School in Houston. They've all been friends since elementary school... it's really cute.) After catching up, we took care of some last minute business for the cruise and then hit the sack.

On Saturday, we woke up before the sun and got ready for our journey. In order to save a little money, we had decided to drive to Florida and leave from Miami instead of Galveston. Something that had not occurred to us up until this point was how in the WORLD we were supposed to fit all of our luggage inside of Chris' car. Thanks to all of our masterful packing skills, we managed to get every piece of luggage inside the car. Little Pily was all surrounded!

After a quick breakfast stop at Mickey D's, we were on our way! I just have to give so much credit to the boys for drive the WHOLE WAY! Chris' car is standard which meant I couldn't drive and Pilar has dabbled in standards but didn't feel capable of flying it solo, so our manly men beasted the drive between the two of them (with the help of our friend, Red Bull).

Seventeen hours, three ipods, at least 30 oz of Red Bull, some gas station parking lot dance parties, a Lady Gaga rage, a shady Orlando gas parking lot near death experience, many naps, Travis near hallucinating and falling asleep at the wheel, and something north of a thousand miles later, we had arrived at Ft. Lauderdale! We made incredible time considering we made the drive in seventeen hours and it was supposed to take around twenty! We did lose two hours thanks to daylight savings time AND traveling across time zones, so instead of arriving at 2 AM we arrived at 4 AM. Pilar's Aunt Jenny was our gracious host and provided us with warm beds which were very much appreciated after such a long drive.

Sunday morning we awoke bright-eyed and bushy-tailed! We had a leisurely breakfast and then crawled back into the car to head down to Miami. We stopped at the friendly, neighborhood Publix (we were very amused with the name) to pick up the necessities like wine, champagne, and Red Bull, and then we hit the road, once again.

It was a beautiful day in South Florida and the perfect opportunity to jam out to "Miami" by Will Smith. One of the most beautiful things for my eyes to behold, after such a long journey, was our ship: the Carnival Valor, waiting patiently at the port for its guests. We were lucky enough to get a parking spot in the lot right next to the ship so we just walked across the street, handed off our luggage, and got in line. Everything went very smoothly and before we knew it, we were taking a picture in front of a cheesey sunset backdrop and boarding the Valor!

....to be continued.....

Family Guy

So I was walking my fifth graders to the restroom after recess today, and one of my kids, a boy, kept saying, "Ms. Hebert!".....
...."Ms. Hebert. Ms. Hebert. Ms. Hebert. Ms. Hebert! Ms. Hebert!"....
So I put my arm around his shoulder and said, "What?"
His reply? "Hi."
I then asked him if he watched Family Guy.
He said "Yeah!" and then he turned to his friend and said, "How did she know?"

Oh, I know, my boy. I know my Family Guy.

Changes

A month since my last post! Either I'm a slacker or it's been a busy month! Yeah, it's been a BUSY month!

Too much has happened for me to try and cram it into one post, so I'm going to cover the highlights now and get more detailed next week when I don't have anything to do!

The biggest thing to happen in the past month has been the birth of my nephew, Mr. Parker Wayne Hebert. He was born twelve days early (due date 3/18, born 3/6) and is absolutely perfect! He is a hairy little guy and looks exactly like his daddy. We've gotten a lot of comments on how beautiful he is, even for a newborn, and I must agree. I have the honor of being his Godmother and I am so excited about this! I'm taking a class this Sunday to prepare myself for his Baptism. It is definitely a gift to live with new parents and a new baby...I am getting so much insight on what to do and what not to do, how new babies work, things like breastfeeding, sleep habits, etc. This will come in handy when I'm a momma :) It is also helping me to see the reality of being a new parent and how much a baby changes your life. I know for sure that I have a lot of living to do before I settle down, marry, and raise kids. I know that I'm called to marriage and to a family, but I've been very blessed with singleness and the option to go wherever I want and explore, and I want to take advantage of that!

The next big thing was the freaking AWESOME cruise I went on for Spring Break. Pilar and two of her friends from high school, Travis and Chris, and I went on a seven day Caribbean cruise. We drove to Miami and stopped at the Cayman Islands, Mahogany Bay off Honduras, Belize, and Cozumel. It was the best week of my life and the people I went with were what made the trip, for sure. I really want to write down all of the details to share and so that I will remember them so I'm going to do day by day posts next week (when I'm FINISHED with my student teaching and have a little more free time!) So get excited for that :)

Those were the exciting things that have happened. The not-so-exciting thing is the job situation on my horizon. We had our career fair today at A&M and, although I feel like I made good connections with some school districts, I couldn't help but be upset at the economical situation right now and at the gloomy mood that was floating around Reed Arena. I was looking at all of the girls I have moved through my education classes at A&M with who are all so talented and thinking about how sad it is that we're in such dire straights concerning jobs. I have faith that God has a plan for me and that I'll be taken care of, but it's hard not knowing what that plan is. Regardless, I'm going to make the most of my last few days with my precious students and enjoy these next few months that I have off/fill out job applications during that time.

I promise I won't wait another month to post again, but it may be a week. Until next time!

The Source

Two posts in three days? I must have a lot on my mind.

I find myself exhausted. Physically? Yes, a little, but if you know me you know that I could always go to sleep. Some would say I have a touch of narcolepsy :)  Emotionally? Yes, of course. I just lost my grandma who lived 20 yards away from us and died exactly a month after getting diagnosed with Leukemia. Of course that would cause me to be emotionally exhausted.

But there's more.

Even before my grandma passed, I was starting to get emotionally exhausted. True, I was dealing with the idea that she was going to die soon and dealing with her hospital and nursing home stays, but I think there is much more to my exhaustion than just that aspect of my life.

When my relationship with God weakens, my exhaustion increases. This is not just something I have realized recently. I have been able to make this correlation with every single time that I have distanced myself from God. Either I start doing things that aren't in line with what I believe and those things put a barrier between God and myself or I just don't keep up with our conversations. What kind of relationship works without communication? Isn't that the most basic of things in a friendship or marriage? It is no different with God. I find that when I start to slip with communication with him, I feel guilty and then put it off. Then I get to the point where I don't talk to him at all.

Sister Celestina pointed out in Spiritual Direction last semester that we tend to make God out as someone who gets annoyed with us for not talking to him or expects long formal prayers or holds things against us. She explained that all he wants is to hear from us...he just wants me to talk to him like I would a friend. To tell him what's going on in my life, what's exciting me, what's bothering me. She explained to me that the way I, personally, was looking at our relationship was like that of one with an acquaintance. I love the way she put it! She said, "You know that person who, every time you see them, asks you to do something or gets mad at you for not doing something? What do you do to those people? You avoid them! If that is how you're looking at God, of course you're going to avoid him, too! Now, when something is bothering you or you found out something exciting, don't you want to run to your best friend with that news? That is all God wants. He wants you to be excited about talking to him and building your relationship together."

These are all things that I knew, but I LOVED the way she worded them. I had been feeling so guilty about going for so long without praying or going to Daily Mass or Adoration that I had just started avoiding him. She really put things in perspective for me and I hope that writing this now will refresh all of this in my mind. It's hard being over here away from the nurturing environment of St. Mary's where I'm held accountable and it's easy to do the right thing.

I know that all of this can sound exhausting. I mean, wouldn't it be easier to just forget about all of this and keep going the way I'm going? I could just find other things to keep from being exhausted, right? I want to reiterate just how strong the correlation is between exhaustion and distance from God. When I'm in communion with God, when our relationship is really strong, I feel like I could climb mountains. There is nothing like it and I always want to be striving for that. I'm a better person all the way around...I'm less stressed, I'm more loving, I curse less, I don't have road rage....the list goes on. He makes all the difference and my prayer now is that I would start running back to him.

One more thing. I loved another thing Sister Cele told me and wanted to share it. When I first started Spiritual Direction last semester, I was burnt out on church. I had been SUPER involved all three years of college and was tired of it. I was also exhausted, like I am now. Sister Cele compared me to a bottle of water and God to a fountain or "The Source". She compared spending time with God to getting close to The Source and filling up your water bottle. Your pour yourself out throughout the days and weeks but if you don't go back to The Source, you're left feeling empty.

I'm tired of feeling empty...I'm going back to The Source.

Up to Heaven She Flew

She was there to say hello, and always with a smile

What followed was a hug that could warm you for a while.

Her kisses were soft and smooshy-the perfect "Grandma" kiss

She always had one ready for her special little Miss.

She spent her days doing for others, not herself

Whether working or worshiping, she would always offer help.

Her family was her life and she always worked to please them

Known by her kid's friends as 'Ma Bell', she was always the cool mom.

She built playhouses and cabanas and chaperoned their beach trips

She worked tirelessly to serve them with love that knew no limits.

Her passion was her faith and that fire burned within

Through sickness and health she loved the Lord all the same.

She fought the good fight, but when her time on earth was through,

She donned a pair of wings and up to Heaven she flew.

My grandma passed away last Wednesday morning. She was a lovely lady who was meant for a place more perfect than this world. I don't mourn for her because she is home, I mourn for my family who just lost a very special person. We have been overwhelmed with support and prayers and are all very thankful for that. Since she was a beautiful poet, I thought I would write a poem just for her.

Say No to the Stress!

I always try to think of a clever way to kick each post off... a hook, if you will. I guess it's just the English teacher in me. Unfortunately, I don't believe I have been very successful with my hooks...or maybe I have since you're still reading?

I think I should be more stressed right now than I am but I also think that I have a lot of stress that is manifesting itself in different ways. I could list everything that is stressing me out (or should be stressing me out) but I don't really like it when other people do that so I won't. Basically, I'm in the middle of my "Full Responsibility" time during student teaching but have had quite a few curveballs thrown at me during this time. None of them have to do with my teaching but just scheduling conflicts and personal things.

The personal thing that I will describe has to do with my grandma. We thought we had about 6 months with her but as of last Wednesday she stopped responding to her chemo and has been very up and down....mainly down. At this point, she's not getting any more blood and our main objective is to just keep her comfortable for these last few days. I've done my grieving and have cried plenty...now I (and my family) am ready to see her out of her pain and home with God. It will honestly be a big relief but it is still going to be very, very hard to not have her around. If you would, please pray for peace and comfort for her as she is in pretty constant pain. I've felt a lot of comfort through all of this which I think has to do with the fact that I know she's going to Heaven and is going to enjoy herself quite a bit more up there than she is here.

So despite this and the other list of things that could potentially stress me out big time, I'm going to listen to Pilar's advice and stay focused and push through. The great thing about this semester is that I always have something to look forward to...this weekend it is Highball (possibly) on Friday and the San Antonio Rodeo on Saturday with Mark, Kathleen, and Caroline. I also have my 5th graders' Valentine's party on Friday to which I'm going to wear my hot pink tights and some sort of festive Valentine's day decorations. I'm excited. I love those tights and I NEVER have a reason to wear them! Also, speaking of Valentine's day...I am debating on whether or not I want to buy myself a massage again. I did that a couple of years ago as a Vday gift to myself since I am usually celebrating Suck it, Cupid day in lieu of Valentine's Day. This is looking like a really good idea. We shall see.

Now to watch the Ags BTHO Colorado.

Patience is a NECESSITY!

Patience, patience, patience. That seems to be the buzz word of the last few weeks! I think the best virtue a teacher can have is patience. I have realized in the last few weeks just how much patience I have as well as how much patience I still need to be a teacher. Most of my students are fabulous....they are loveable and sweet and they draw me pictures and even if they don't turn their work in on time sometimes, they are easy to love.

---Also, I would like to take this moment to say that I do love all of them...and I do like all of them...even when they are about to drive me up the wall and through the ceiling. I understand that they are just children but I do need some sort of outlet to vent about my beloved children so I am doing that here and now.---

There are a select few of my students with whom I must "count to ten" with. These are the students who have behavior contracts and who have honesty issues and who must be told and reminded over and over and over to turn in their papers or to correct their papers or to use their strategies...blahblahblah....
As frustrating as it is, all you need is patience. (and liquor sometimes...just sayin'!) About 98% of the time, these kids have reasons why they are the way they are. The other 2%, well, those are pretty rare cases that we won't talk about now :)

Patience has also come in handy for me when it comes to working with other people. I think any other teacher or intern or apprentice or personworkingwithorunderanotherperson can appreciate what I am about to say. I so appreciate everything my cooperating teacher has done and is doing for me this semester. She is an AWESOME teacher and I am learning so much from her...and I am not just saying this to be politically correct. However, I can't wait to just have my own classroom. I want to be the only one in charge in my classroom. I want to be the only one students come to with questions, the only authority figure, the one who decorates the room, the one who sits behind the desk. (While I'm at it, I can't WAIT to have my own house! I've been diving into Pottery Barn magazines and HGTV and drooling over decor ideas.) I think these are all pretty normal things to be feeling when you're in my position. I'm sure on my first day of school as a brand new teacher I will be wishing I had a seasoned teacher with me!

School isn't the only place I have needed patience this semester. I knew it was going to be hard to be away from everyone in College Station this semester and I was right. I am absolutely loving being in Austin with Pat and Allison and spending time with Rachel and Whitney (before Whitney jets off to NYC!) It is wonderful here. But just like I imagined, I look on Facebook and see things that I'm missing out on and I feel a little pang of pain/jealousy/homesickness. Now, I am not writing this to make anyone feel guilty...that is certainly not my intent. This is just an area of my life where I am having to utilize patience. I have always tried to do everything in my power to be everywhere that I could in order to not miss out on anything...if I had multiple things scheduled for one weekend I would try to do all of them. I always took off work for everything including A&M games, family weekends, retreats, etc, because I couldn't bear to miss any of it. Now I am missing out on one thing to experience this other great thing and it is just going to have to be a learning experience. I must learn not to be neurotic (I inherited insane neurosis, thanks Mom!) when people don't return phone calls or texts right away. Distance changes things and I will admit that I am bad at those things sometimes, too. Patience.

So the theme? Patience. Patience is always a virtue, a must, a necessity. At this point in my life I am waiting on a lot of things, so the song "While I'm Waiting" by John Waller will always have a special place in my heart. It helps me to stay patient :)

It's the Weekend!

Praise God, it's Saturday! I know that I have ranted and raved about how much I love my students, and I do! BUT....they were awful yesterday. I wasn't the only one who felt that way so I know it wasn't just me. They were a little testy all week to be honest. The other teachers said it was a combination of the full moon, the weather, and the holiday on Monday. I was just relieved to know that it wasn't just me being naive in the first two weeks and then learning what the kids are REALLY like. I'm sure I (and they) will be back to normal on Monday. I just needed a break.

The funny thing was, after such a long Friday all the teachers went to Happy Hour at Serrano's! I didn't go with them, but I did go to a Happy Hour. Rachel, her roommate Ashley, and I went to a cute little place called Zocolo for Happy Hour and had our cute little Sangritas.

Now, I shall backtrack. This week was very eventful aside from the students. Monday was a holiday, and I must say that I was very productive! I went for a run, did a little shopping, wrote a lesson plan, made vegetable soup, visited my grandma, and watched The Bachelor with Rachel and Whitney. Wednesday we went to the basketball game ...which was unfortunately a huge butt whoopin'. We had fun anyway, however. Mark came into town for it and brought with him an adorable monogrammed bag for me! It's a perfect teacher bag. I LOVE IT. We had VIP passes to the game thanks to a guy Pat works with so we got to go into the Lone Star Club and have drinks before the game. Besides all of the burnt orange, it was pretty cool :) After the game, my friends were nice enough to go to the Pluckers by my house (which is WAY north of Austin) and drop me off at home. Totes worth it. Thursday we went to see Mercy Me in concert. They were just as awesome as I imagined they would be! The lead singer was hilarious and had a beautiful kind of joy about him...you could just really see God in him.

I hope to be productive today. The Ags play K. State at 1pm and the sips play Kansas at 3pm. I also need to go buy some skinny jeans. Theeeen we're going downtown tonight! Itsss gonna be a good day!

Chain Reaction

Two days in a row! Looks like I'm doing well!

I can't believe I forgot to include probably the biggest thing that's happened in my life in the past week. I've told some of my friends about this but there are a few updates. My grandma was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer a few years ago called Mastacytosis. It affects about 6 people in America and is sort of like Leukemia. She went into remission about 2 1/2 years ago and has been doing very well. After Christmas, however, she started getting sick again. Long story short, she ended up at Seton for a blood and platelet transfusion and found out that her cancer turned into Acute Leukemia. She started up on a different kind of chemo than what she was on and is still in the hospital now (she was admitted last Wednesday.) She has had a lot of visitors and has been in good spirits for the most part. Her chemo isn't making her sick but her low immune system is. We were told yesterday that she probably has about 6 months...I took that with a grain of salt because my grandpa was told that many times and kept going for many years! I will definitely try to make the most of my time with her and not take her for granted like I have so often in the past, but I will not let her use that "sentence" as a reason to give up.

We're working on getting her an account set up for the directed donor program. Luckily January is like National Blood Donor month or something so there are lots of blood drives! Hopefully it will work out for all of our friends to donate directly to her.

My mom is really going to need some prayers through all of this as well. My grandma lives next door to us so Mom usually ends up taking care of her. Of course my mom does this because she loves her, but it definitely takes a toll on her. Mom is an empty nester who is used to only worrying about herself and my dad now so this is kind of like handing her a new child to take care of. I hope none of that sounds callous! It's just that things like this tend to have a chain reaction.

All of that being said, I trust that God has a great plan for my grandma and for all of us. His plan for me right now is to finish up this post and review my lesson on prepositions that I will teach the kiddos tomorrow! It will probably involve me standing UNDER a chair, ON a chair, IN a chair, etc, etc. Can't wait!!! :)